Stimpunks Foundation × More Realms
for the meeting where someone says the real world won't wait
Broadside · Open edition
Side A of B
“Better Get
Used To It”
Ask for a slower pace and you will meet one answer so often that it has an acronym. Homework young because there's homework later. Grades young because there are grades eventually. No accommodation at school because the real world won't accommodate you. The logic never changes: life will be hard later, so hardship now is preparation.
Hardship now is
not preparation.
BGUTI · named by Alfie Kohn, 2005 · early adversity is not a vaccine
It has to ignore them
The argument treats the timetable as the fixed thing and the child as the adjustable one. But children arrive at things at genuinely different rates — so “everyone gets this at this age” guarantees some are handed what they cannot yet use. BGUTI doesn't overlook developmental difference by accident. It cannot survive noticing it.
And it isn't true
Kohn again, and it is exact: people don't really get better at coping with unhappiness because they were deliberately made unhappy when they were young. Early adversity is not a vaccine. It mostly teaches you that adults will do this to you.
Where it does its worst
Behaviorism watches compliance and reaches for consequences, so it has no way to represent a child who needs longer. Needing longer shows up as refusing; refusing gets a consequence. The consequence never changes the pace. It only adds fear to it.
“Almost by definition, the BGUTI defense ignores developmental differences.”
Alfie Kohn · “Getting Hit on the Head Lessons” · Education Week · 7 September 2005
Stimpunks Foundation × More Realms
look at the water, not the creature
Broadside · Open edition
Side B of B
The animal, and its bill
272 years, and 156 to grow up.The Greenland shark lives in water near freezing and grows less than a centimetre a year. Nielsen and colleagues dated 28 of them in Science in 2016: a life span of at least 272 years, the largest animal at 392 ± 120, and age at maturity of at least 156 ± 22 — inferred from body length, not observed.
And that is not a superpower.A species that takes 156 years to reproduce even once has almost no capacity to replace losses. They were hunted in very large numbers and still turn up in trawls. The IUCN lists them as Vulnerable. Slowness is a strategy with a bill attached — superbly fitted to an ocean that held still, nearly defenceless against one that changes in decades.
So look at the water.A ruined cornea is a disaster in bright water and nothing at 400 metres. A 156-year childhood works in an ocean that holds still and is fatal in one full of trawlers. None of those outcomes is a fact about the shark. You cannot tell whether a pace is a problem by looking at the creature — you have to look at the water.
What to ask instead
Not “how do we get this child up to speed?”But: what is this environment demanding, who chose that, and what would it cost to stop?
Name the model.The social model of disability distinguishes a body's condition from the disabling produced by environments built as though that condition didn't exist. Stairs disable a wheelchair user. The pace of a school day disables a kid who needs longer.
Ask for the design change, not the indulgence.Slow pedagogy — unhurried time, room to revisit, the present treated as though it counted. Not a kindness extended to slow children; a change that stops manufacturing failure.
Change the water and hold the person.Naming the environment is not a reason to leave anyone without help while the world gets redesigned.
Not:
Not slow is better. See the bill, above. It's a set of trade-offs, and some are brutal.
Not everyone just needs more time. Sometimes it's a different route, a support, a tool, or dropping the demand. “Go slower” is one accommodation, not the answer.
Not “but the real world won't wait.” Sometimes true, and still no licence for BGUTI — and the real world is also built, also by someone, also changeable.
Not a reason to skip support. Naming the environment must never leave anyone without help while we wait for it to change.
Not biology proving a politics. A rhyme, not a proof — a person's pace would deserve respect in an ocean where everything moved at one speed.
We don’t prepare students for a world of potential oppression by oppressing them.
BGUTI is Alfie Kohn's, from “Getting Hit on the Head Lessons,” Education Week, 7 September 2005; both quotations on the face are verbatim. The blunter line on this side is Stimpunks' own, marked as ours. The shark: Nielsen et al. (2016), Science 353(6300), 702–704 — figures carry real uncertainty and are given as the paper gives them, and the conservation concern is the authors' own. The social model of disability is the British disabled people's movement's — UPIAS (1976) — named by Mike Oliver. Slow pedagogy follows Alison Clark, Slow Knowledge and the Unhurried Child.